Ch 50: My Multiverse Supermarket

As soon as Fan Yuxian finished speaking, the vending machine responded, “I am the intelligent assistant, Xiao Wan. What product would you like to purchase?”

Fan Yuxian’s pupils contracted—the voice didn’t sound human at all!

If she hadn’t remembered her “heavenly envoy” persona, her shock would’ve betrayed her.

Putting on an air of mystery, she said, “Why does the celestial friend avoid meeting me face-to-face?”

“Target detected as non-member. Xiao Wan will temporarily suspend vending services. If assistance is needed, please contact the owner.”

Fan Yuxian, seeing that the so-called celestial child didn’t come out to expose her, immediately regained her confidence.

“How rude! I am an envoy of the Jade Emperor. Since we both serve in the Celestial Palace, refusing to meet me is discourteous.”

Gong Qiongxian said, “Envoy, from what Xiao Wan said, it seems that you must first join as a supermarket member before she will answer your questions.”

“Supermarket member?” Fan Yuxian had missed the earlier explanation Zhou Li gave Feng Zhang about what a “member” meant.

Nearby refugees muttered among themselves, “Isn’t she supposed to be the Jade Emperor’s envoy? How come she doesn’t know what a member is?”

Zhao Changyan silently thought, You people just learned that too.

Fan Yuxian’s hearing was sharp. She heard the whispers and snapped, “The celestial friend and I serve different masters! I do not need to abide by the rules of this walled city!”

Xian Sanniang asked curiously, “Since you’re also an immortal, do you have your own dwelling?”

“Of course,” said Fan Yuxian confidently. “On Mount Luofu.”

Before pretending to be the Jade Emperor’s envoy, she had already fabricated her origin story—complete with a home base. Mount Luofu was famous as an “immortal mountain,” one of Taoism’s sacred lands, where many practitioners resided.

She’d prepared thoroughly. Even if someone went to investigate, they’d only hear that a Jade Emperor’s envoy indeed resided there.

“Does your cave-dwelling also have as many wondrous goods as this one?” Xian Sanniang asked.

That opened the floodgates. Other refugees grew bolder.

“Does your cave shine like daylight too?”

“Can you show us your divine powers?”

“Can you move your cave here so we can see it?”

“…”

With every new question, Fan Yuxian’s face grew darker.

Gong Qiongxian glanced at her but made no move to help.

Fan Yuxian, humiliated and angry, snapped, “You lowborn rabble—how dare you!”

Whatever goodwill the refugees had for her evaporated instantly.

The goddess might be strict and aloof, but she had genuinely helped the people—and treated nobles and commoners alike without discrimination.

Fan Yuxian, however, fawned nervously over Prince Wei just because of his rank, while barking orders at ordinary folk like they were dirt.

Compared side by side, the difference was glaring.

“Hmph, fine! We don’t care if we’re unworthy. We have the goddess—we don’t need your cave anyway!” a small child taunted, sticking his tongue out at her.

“You—!” Fan Yuxian began to scold him, but Gong Qiongxian quickly stepped in to smooth things over. “Envoy, why lower yourself to quarrel with them?”

Fan Yuxian shot her an angry glare, then stormed into the supermarket.

She would see for herself this so-called “goddess” that Gong Qiongxian regarded so highly.

Inside the supermarket.

Zhou Li thought, Oh, she’s coming for me.

She put away her sunflower seeds and busied herself with the calculator on the counter.

She figured that if she just didn’t make eye contact, the woman wouldn’t talk to her.

But Fan Yuxian hadn’t come to loiter like some scammy bus driver at a train station—ignoring her wouldn’t make her go away.

Fan Yuxian gave her a once-over and probed, “You look unfamiliar, celestial friend. Under whose command do you serve?”

Zhou Li straightened her back. “I was born and raised under the Red Flag.”

“Red… Flag?” Fan Yuxian was baffled.

She’d studied countless folktales about immortals—Sanqing Patriarchs, the Queen Mother of the West, you name it—but had never heard of any immortal called “Red Flag.”

Fan Yuxian said, “I’ve walked the mortal realm as the Jade Emperor’s envoy for many years, yet I’ve never heard of this Red Flag immortal in the heavens.”

“If you want to know,” Zhou Li said, “I recommend you buy the ‘Marxism Project’ textbook. I don’t have that in stock right now, but I do still have my college ‘Introduction to Mao Zedong Thought’ book. It’s not for sale, though—I still need it.”

Fan Yuxian: ?

She understood every word, yet none of it made sense together.

Wait—was this some secret language only true immortals could understand?

No, if the other person hadn’t seen through her disguise, then maybe she was also pretending—just afraid of being exposed herself.

Fan Yuxian said stiffly, “No need. We serve different masters. As the saying goes, those who walk different paths cannot work together.”

Zhou Li: …

“So, what did you come here for then?” she asked.

Fan Yuxian was momentarily speechless.

She couldn’t exactly admit she’d come to test the goddess’s power—and had only ended up frustrated.

Back in the capital, she’d always been revered. Officials seeking promotions would beg for her favor. She was used to being worshiped, not dismissed like this.

Fine then. She’d show this woman something impressive—make her respect her properly!

“I came,” Fan Yuxian declared, “to spar with you in divine arts.”

“Oh,” Zhou Li said calmly. “Then you win.”

Fan Yuxian: ?

She… just conceded? In front of all her followers?

Wasn’t she afraid they’d all lose faith and leave?

But reality proved otherwise.

Following behind Qiao Siniang, Qiao Jiuniang, who didn’t understand the tension in the air at all, looked up at Fan Yuxian—who was about the same age as her grandmother—and then at the calculator sitting on the counter. Curious, she asked Zhou Li, “goddess, what’s this?”

Zhou Li looked down and replied, “It’s a calculator. It works the same way as an abacus or counting rods.”

“Why can it talk?”

“It helps users check their numbers and also allows those who can’t read to use it correctly.”

Qiao Jiuniang turned to her sister. “Sister, let’s buy a calculator. If we have one, you won’t miscount anymore.”

Qiao Siniang had made quite a bit of money this time selling sanitary pads.
But because she wasn’t good with numbers, she had been cheated a few times and lost some money.

She had planned to buy an abacus, but she’d still have to learn how to use it.
Now, with a better counting tool right in front of them, Qiao Jiuniang wanted her sister to have one.

Qiao Siniang quickly pulled her sister back, afraid she might accidentally offend Fan Yuxian.

Fan Yuxian was different from the goddess—she was on the side of the nobles.
The goddess wouldn’t punish refugees on a whim, but the powerful could punish them for any reason—or none at all.

Zhou Li said, “Calculators are ten yuan each. You can buy them from the vending machine outside. If you don’t know how to use one, come to me and I’ll teach you.”

“Thank you for the guidance, goddess.” Qiao Siniang pulled her sister out of the store.

Qiao Jiuniang whispered, “Sister, weren’t you here to restock?”

Qiao Siniang said, “The goddess seems busy. We’ll come another day.”

Zhou Li wanted to say she actually wasn’t busy at all—
but with Fan Yuxian still standing there like a scarecrow, anyone who came in would just get frightened away.

So Zhou Li took out her iPad, opened the Journey to the West video she’d downloaded, and said to Fan Yuxian, “You said you wanted to compete in divine arts? Can you summon wind and rain? Can you take off your head and put it back on?”

Fan Yuxian’s heart jumped in alarm.

Summoning wind and rain—she might be able to fake that by picking a day it was about to rain.
But removing her own head and still living? Impossible!

Before she could respond, the Journey to the West theme song began playing from the iPad.

Zhou Li skipped the intro and dragged the progress bar straight to the scene where Sun Wukong competes in magic with the three national preceptors of Chechi Kingdom.

Fan Yuxian, who had never seen such a device, instinctively took a step back. “What is that?”

“It’s a popular electronic device where I come from.”

By now, Gong Qiongxian, Zhao Changyan, and a few eunuchs had gathered around.

They all began talking at once:
“Is this where the goddess keeps her captured demons?”
“Are those the monkey spirit and pig spirit?”
“How can they move around inside there?”

Zhao Changyan soon noticed that the people inside couldn’t interact with them.

Those figures seemed to exist in another world entirely, unaware of being observed—and they, in turn, couldn’t interfere with that world, only watch it through this divine artifact.

Just then, the video reached the part where Sun Wukong’s spirit left his body to fly up to Heaven in search of rain.

“The monkey spirit went up to the Celestial Palace? So that’s what Heaven looks like…” said Feng Zhang, who had wandered over at some point, watching with wide-eyed fascination.

But the more Fan Yuxian watched, the more uneasy she became.

Even the demons could ride clouds—yet she could not. Would her disguise be exposed?

Sure enough, the next second, Feng Zhang turned to her and requested that she ride a cloud to Heaven and ask the Jade Emperor for rain.

—After all, wasn’t this supposed to be a duel of divine powers? And wasn’t cloud-riding a basic skill for immortals?

Zhao Changyan thought to herself, At least she should be able to come and go as freely as the goddess, right?

Fan Yuxian argued, “Your Highness, that is demon magic! That place isn’t Heaven at all—it’s the demons’ realm. Look, there’s a monkey spirit, a pig spirit, a tiger spirit, a deer spirit, and even a goat spirit!”

Her reasoning sounded convincing enough that Feng Zhang nodded in agreement.

Expressionless, Zhou Li turned off the iPad screen.

As the display went dark, everyone around looked a little disappointed.

Then one of Feng Zhang’s eunuchs said, “So, by the envoy’s logic, does that mean she’s a demon too?”

“Watch your tongue! Do not insult the goddess!” Gong Qiongxian barked.

She had just secured Zhou Li’s agreement to let her be a distributor—if Zhou Li were angered and left, Gong Qiongxian would lose her leverage, her imperial task, and likely her head.

So she had to defend Zhou Li, even if it meant standing against Fan Yuxian.

Fan Yuxian was now trapped.

If she didn’t go along with the eunuch’s words, Feng Zhang would suspect her for not showing any divine power.
But if she agreed and accused Zhou Li of being a demon—what if Zhou Li really could take off her head?

Zhou Li wasn’t about to waste energy arguing.

“If I were a demon,” she said calmly, “then perhaps you should ask yourselves—why have the demons brought no suffering to humankind, while you, who claim to be human, have turned the mortal world into hell? Who are the real monsters here?”

Both Zhao Changyan and Gong Qiongxian froze, their hearts struck by her words.

Outside, the refugees suddenly fell to their knees with a loud rustle.

“Goddess is wise and just!” they cried, tears streaming down their faces.

Zhou Li blinked. “What—how did they even hear that?”

The system said, “Apologies. The external speakers were accidentally turned on. Your words were broadcast to the crowd.”

Zhou Li: …

“You what?”

The system answered solemnly, “If you were falsely branded as a demon, it would severely harm trade. As the system, I cannot allow that to happen.”

Zhou Li’s eyes rolled as an idea struck her. “Then install an LED display for me. I’ll loop my college political theory lecture videos—teach them to reject superstition.”

System: “And while you’re at it, teach them to sing The Internationale, perhaps?”

Zhou Li: “…”

She bickered with the system, but she wouldn’t actually go that far.

The eunuch pressed again, “But aren’t natural disasters the work of demons?”

“Every time a disaster happens,” Zhou Li said, “you claim it’s because humans have sinned and Heaven is punishing them—so the emperor issues an edict of self-blame. Yet now you say it’s the demons’ fault? Which is it?”

She continued, “You cannot prevent disasters, but you can prepare for them—and you can rebuild afterward.

“If people live securely and have savings, one storm won’t strip them of everything they own.
If disaster victims are cared for afterward, they won’t have to wander the land or sell their children to survive.

“Natural disasters may be merciless—but humans can choose to be compassionate.
If even humanity loses compassion, then what difference is there between this world and hell?”

The eunuch was struck speechless.

If Zhou Li had been an ordinary woman, he would’ve had her seized and executed on the spot.
But against a divine figure, he dared not.

Feng Zhang, meanwhile, looked detached and unconcerned.

Gong Qiongxian, however, rejoiced inwardly. She had chosen the right topic earlier—typhoons and floods were exactly what the goddess had just spoken about: human compassion in the face of calamity.

Zhou Li, bored of lecturing, said, “My time’s valuable. Anyone else got something to say—or can we wrap this up?”

Feng Zhang hurriedly said, “I want to register for a membership card.”

He had embarrassed himself before, but now, convinced of Zhou Li’s true divine power, he came over shamelessly, hoping she wouldn’t still hold a grudge.

Zhou Li privately thought that if the state of Yue were ever left in Feng Zhang’s hands, it would be doomed—but she wasn’t here to fix governments.

Since he hadn’t broken any supermarket rules, she couldn’t refuse his membership.

Besides, it was better for him to spend his obsession on collecting “miraculous treasures” here than exploiting the people outside.

Still, she warned him, “Are you sure? Once you join, you must abide by the supermarket’s rules. If you break them, I reserve the right to revoke your membership.”

Feng Zhang figured those rules wouldn’t really affect him and agreed cheerfully.

…

Once even Feng Zhang had registered, Fan Yuxian realized there was no hope of labeling Zhou Li a demon anymore.

She left the supermarket in a panic.

The refugees stared at her with not a trace of reverence left in their eyes.

From that day forward, even if the “goddess” truly were a demon, they would still follow her.

☢️☢️☢️